So, you want to be a technical writer...

Releasing the hounds…

I’m sure there are those out there who think corporations are only looking out for your best interests. I’m sure there are those who believe corporations never hurt anyone and do a fine job regulating themselves. I’m sure there’s a person right now who is certain that any reasonable person who tells them otherwise is lying.

That person is insane.

Today, the Supreme Court with a short-sightedness not seen since perhaps Dred Scot let corporate influence in government go completely unfettered. Corporations can now buy whatever candidate they want and buy the votes as well. The depths to which this extends is unfathomable. It began with a case in Santa Clara and today found its most expensive conclusion.

Of course, huge corporations have already done untold damage. Look at health care. Look at Wall Street. Look at the banks that are “too big to fail”. With unfettered access to any politician, that is just the tip of the ice berg.

You’ll hear people say that it’s a case of civil rights, freedom of speech. But you won’t hear them admit what a lie that is. Corporations are not citizens and do not need to employ citizens. As a result of this ruling, our politics are now endangered by foreign interests as well as the evil bastards we grow at home. In that face of unlimited money and power, what can we do?

Well, there is one thing. I’m not saying it’s much – at this point, I don’t know what would be enough – but Alan Grayson has created a petition (at www.savedemocracy.net) to get some basic legislation passed through Congress to put some small regulations in place. You can find that here.

It won’t make things right but it may make things slightly less nightmarish. In the meantime, keep active and educated and we’ll do what we can.

Voodoo Christians…

Something I’ve wanted to mention for a while now has sprung its ugly head once again, this time in the form of Pat Robertson. I’m sure there are those who would still call him “Reverend”, though “Voodoo Priest” is more fitting.

After the horrible devastation in Haiti, Pat Robertson said it happened because Haiti had a deal with the devil. Now, ignoring for a minute the logistics – anyone in his scenario would likely be dead already, the country has changed governments more than once since then, a nation cannot make deals with a fictional character – this is just another indication in a recent turn in a subsection of Christianity I like to call “Voodoo Christianity”.

Another example is the trend of some right-wing preachers “praying” for someone’s death, usually someone they don’t like. Obama, for instance. They basically throw the Bible out with the bath water and start claiming to have special powers or some inside information and it makes me wonder just how stupid those Christians who follow them are. I mean, sure, you believe there’s a man in the sky – one mark against your sanity – but then you throw away all the teachings your religion is based on to follow some lunatic who can’t be described any more generously than “fucking psycho”.

And for those Christians who think they hold no responsibility, I call bullshit. You are responsible for the acts of anyone who calls themselves Christian for this is how your religion is ultimately judged. Do you want to be in the same circle as the voodoo priests, the right wing whackos, and lunatic nut-jobs? Tend your own garden, people. You’ve always had some weeds in there; you don’t need hemlock as well.

If only the poor could quit being so… poor…

American charity. Two words that rank up there with Republican Christian and Military Intelligence. American’s are so charitable they’ve actually forced one church to stop feeding the homeless because it… attracts homeless people!

God forbid.

But there it is, at a church in Phoenix, Americans behaving so charitably they’re forcing a church to stop providing free breakfasts to the homeless. This probably shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone. After all, people protest equal right because it violates their “right” to be bigots (cough – Prop 8 – cough). And they scream and carry on when someone tries to provide health care for all, calling that a “death panel”. And, after all, this is the country where the rights of corporations are placed above the individual. I suppose our national motto should be “Fuck off! I’ve got mine!”

Another one bites the dust...

News from work... there is no work.

As you can see from One Path (you do read One Path, right?), I was laid off today.

Deja fucking Vu...

How big business works against us...

Look at this.

If you want to know why big businesses should not be protected for our benefit, look at this.

If you want to understand what we're up against, look at this.

If you think that big businesses are only there to help us, look at this.

If you believe that big business is your friend, look at this.

If you've bought into all of the anti-union propoganda, look at this.

Listen to their own words.

And remember.

Meanwhile, back at work...

One of my coworkers got yelled at today. That part isn't really news-worthy. You get dragged into offices and yelled at quite a bit where I work. It's motivating.

Or, at least, I think they think it is.

Because my coworker was yelled at today for something outstanding. He was yelled at today... for being negative. Let me repeat that. He was pulled into an office with our boss who yelled at him for 15 minutes because he, my coworker, doesn't really like his job. Mind you, we were all lied to when we interviewed, we're treated like crap, our educations are going to waste as we do busy work...

... yelling at a guy is just the thing to make him forget that.

Interns and Execs...

That's all they hire at my company now. Interns and Execs.

They've created a whole new level of middle executive: Senior Director. He oversees the Directors and report to ... well, nobody. All the other positions are quickly being filled by Interns. Need an engineer? Hire an intern. Seriously. I applied for a Marketing Communications Writer position but they filled it with an Intern.

And so it goes.

I met one of the new interns today.

"Hi. I'm Angela," she said.

"Hi, Angela."

"No, Dangela."

"Dangela?"

"No, Gangela."

"Jumanji?"

Later, I found out her name was Dan-jor.

She's from fucking Krypton.

Welcome to 1967...

I couldn't believe it. I even had to ask.

It was true. At my place of employment, people have started putting post-its on conference room doors. "This conference room is reserved by Bob's team for Thursday, 1/15 2-3pm." "This conference room is reserved by HR for Monday, 1/19 10-11:30." And on and on.

Turns out, this is my company's new - and, sadly, official - method of reseving conference rooms.

Boy. Just think how easily this will be once they invent computers!

What is this thing called FRAUD...

And here's a follow up to the story of our very depressed engineer who moonlights as a writer (see below) ...

We finished the datasheet. Now, the sales department can begin selling it.

One problem: The product doesn't exist. In fact, it can't exist. The company can't afford the investment required to make it.

So, they're going to sell it and delay shipment (because they don't have it) until they have enough orders to justify actually making the product.

Hmmm... they're selling a product that doesn't exist... where's my dictionary? I think I want to look up the word "fraud".

Defeatism as Corporate Culture...

As I might have mentioned, my position here at work - in fact, my entire team - is pretty unnecessary. Our job description is to create datasheets and product packaging but nobody lets us write and the graphics and layouts are done elsewhere.

But sometimes, something slips through... and sometimes it gets scary.

So, yesterday before I left, I was given a datasheet to proofread. I was given it by an engineer who had written it from scratch. I asked, "Do you want me to correct it?" He said, "No. I just want to make sure all of my writing is in there as I wrote it." Right.

So, I went over it this morning. It was for a product that has been stripped down because my company can't afford to make it with all the bells and whistles the engineer wanted. Here's what it said, "While most ____ have (features we don't include), (our product) keeps it simple." Seriously, it said "keeps it simple" to mean "just can't do it". It went on to talk about all the features we won't be offering, one paragraph at a time...

So, being stupid, I went over and asked the engineer if he was sure he wanted to go this way. (I know they'll eventually blame me because I'm supposed to be the writer, even though they won't allow me to change what the engineers write.) He said, "What's wrong with it?" I replied, "Usually, marketing writing tries to find the virtue in a product and emphasize that." His answer, "But this isn't marketing writing. It's for sales!"

... at which point, my brain imploded...

I gotta find a new job.

How do I get myself into these things?...

The subject heading is a misnomer, sarcasm at best.

This morning, I didn't get much of a chance to hear my alarm go off. Vicky startled me with, "Turn off your alarm!" and I did... and fell back asleep...

I got a call about a replacement being needed for a show that was already having performances. It was a show I'd already done, so everyone assumed I'd know my lines. Of course, once I got on stage, this little, dinky box stage that was deeper than it was wide, I needed to constantly refer to the script so obviously it was embarrassing.

"Tell me now! Tell me what I did was right! Tell me before I plunge this dagger through my heart!" This was only followed by a "shuffle shuffle shuffle" as I scanned through the script for my line as she held the knife aloft, dramatically, ready to plunge it... "Um... Yes. You did."

It was a play about vampires and I was dressed in the layered outfit with a huge overcoat on top. It had to be huge, cause so was I! I was fat, slow, forgetful, and unable to maneuver through the simplest exchange. Soon, I realized all of the other actors carried scripts as well and we were being booed. Then, Act One ended.

I couldn't believe it. "This is crazy," I told the director. "Absolutely crazy. I'm better than this! I know I am! This is inexcusable!"

"So? What are you going to do?" he asked.

"I'm going to go through the script and memorize the lines!" I told him.

There were some further exchanges in there about football players at halftime being pissed off because they weren't playing to their fullest potential and that was me. I knew I had only 15 minutes at most to memorize Act Two and I scanned through the script but I couldn't find the lines. Page after page was covered in advertisements. The director told me that was the only way they could afford to print scripts any more.

And then, the curtain was coming up and I hadn't even found Act Two, yet.

And the lights were on me...

And I woke up. Grateful to be in my bed.

I knew I was trying to tell myself I was out of practice, out of shape, inexcusably absent from the stage... but, hopefully, when I do return, it'll go slightly better than that.

Token Bro...

Backstory: Harley, our lovely little Maine Coon cat, has taken to napping on the stairs...

Mainstory: I was heading down the stairs in the dark the other night...

Pointtothestory: I broke my fucking pinkie toe!!!!

Harley was squished but is just fine.

After 43 years - the verdict: FAIL...

I was reading about the FAIL meme this morning (over here for the unwashed) and I couldn't help but think: Yep, there you go. That's you.

I suppose I should explain. My birthday has long been my least favorite day of the year. It is a constant reminder of just what a joke my life has been and what a humiliating experience it is to be me.

Let me explain. I have lived my life and really worked hard to do the one thing I want to do with it; that is being a writer or even an actor. Okay, that's two - but an artist in one form or another. So, I've acted - or, at least, I've tried ot act. I've written 16 novels and 5 plays. And yet, I've been an abject failure at both. Some people think trying equals succeeding - but honestly, do you pass by the bum on the street and say, "You're the President of the United States!" No. You don't. And for that same reason, I don't see myself as a writer or an actor, no matter how much effort I have put into it and continue to put into it. In fact, the way things have turned out, the only thing my efforts have given me is a pretty crappy job at a pretty crappy company. Honestly, it's pretty pathetic.

I like to think of myself as a fairly decent, good-natured, nice guy. But I've never had a lot of friends. I've never been the guy who has the big birthday party. I can't even tell you how many birthday parties have been thrown for me because it's so embarrassing.

Which is probably why I just want to go home tonight - from work, cause abuse on your birthday is important I guess - and eat Ramen. Cause, really, what's the point? Vicky will probably want to go out, but mostly because she won't want to cook and will feel guilty about that. It's traditional at this point to say "Vicky is the one good thing I have in my life" - but the fact is she's a person in my life, not my life. She's doing fine - but we've been fighting so often lately I don't have the energy to make the platitude.

Of the few friends I have: One wouldn't even invite me to his wedding this month and when he asked me to be his friend in Facebook, didn't even say so much as "Hi". In fact, he still won't talk to me. Another one can't be bothered unless it's to tell me about his sex life - and that's what I want to hear. The rest can't be bothered. As much as I like to think of myself as a writer, nobody I know wants to read anything I write - which leads me to believe that you readers are strangers.

Nobody really gives a shit.

And there you have it: FAIL.

I'm staying away from EPIC FAIL. I don't think I'm there quite yet... but every year brings me closer.

I guess I'm saying all this to share the misery a bit. I mean, I know there are plenty who are worse off than I. That's obvious. There are plenty far better off, of course; they stopped reading after paragraph one... several years ago. But there may be quite a few at the same level of misery and I want you to know - I get it. I'm with you. We'll get through this Every day brings as much hope as it does just as much abject failure.

Today sucks. Tomorrow sucks ass. The day after sucks zombie ass.

But the day after that could suck a whole lot less. You never know. It's been 43 years now. Odds have got to turn one of these days...

This bugs me...

The bugs were really out this morning as I was out on my ride. It was a lot like having someone throw buckets of bugs at you. You know - fun.

But if you want to know true terror, imagine getting a bug caught in your mustache. You're riding and you don't know if the little guy bounced off or is caught in the mass of hair... and if he's moving up towards your nose... or down to your mouth...

Damn, I must really like cycling...

A bad case of the Whatnexts...

Murielle...

After You Fall...

Last Ditch...

One play after another after a book after another... What do I get out of it?

Here's a shocking equation: 16 books and 5 plays have equalled 0 sales. It's something I have to face every day of my life. Other writers tell me how good I am, actors tell me they love my plays, but none of that means anything in terms of financial success. Nobody buys my stuff. It's a shameful admission. It makes me miserable.

Yet, I keep going.

I keep thinking, "Maybe if I do things a little differently. If I just get a little better." But I know that's not the case; we've all seen utter shit in the book market and trainwrecks on stage or screen. It's not a question of quality. It's a question of luck.

So, I keep going, thinking that maybe the next thing will bring me a little luck, a little recognition, make it all a little less pointless.

It's like gambling, you know? I've got a lifetime of losses to make up for - I should never have gotten into it.

My most recent play, Murielle's Big Date, is easily the funniest, most absurd, most dynamic play to date. I have no doubt that it's better than most of the rest of the shows I've seen. But what it's going to come down to has nothing to do with any of that. It's going to come down to the mood of the person reviewing it and whether they want something like that. (That's why I've made it a single set show with a small cast - to maximize the possibilities. Show runners love easy sets and small casts.) But the bottom line is that each person reviewing submissions, for shows or books or whatever, is looking for one specific thing and, if I'm not it, they move along. It's not about quality; it's about chemistry.

Anyway, it's all pretty damned heart-breaking.

And there's no stopping, of course. I've got three papers to write for school this semester but after those I already know what comes next. The next book is the follow up to Climbing Maya, a book not only answering the question of free will but also a story about my father's death and how each of his sons had a different part of themselves stripped away. It's going to be more complex, more emotional, and more profound than Climbing Maya, both related to and completely detached from the previous book. More marketable and more personal - because the bottom line, folks, is that there's much more than gambling going on here. I'm writing for far more than publication; I'm writing for me, too. The answers that I find are answers that I'm looking for, after all.

But I will say this. It's pretty damn exhausting.

For those who don't "get it"...

I was reading a little something by John Haidt today, writing about why liberals don't "get it" and what they can learn from Republicans. "[M]orality is not just about how we treat each other (as most liberals think); it is also about binding groups together, supporting essential institutions, and living in a sanctified and noble way."

If you're not as appalled by that as I, allow me to explain something to you and to Mr. Haidt.

If morality is about "binding groups together", how can you call Republicans moral when their specialty is divisiveness? Their great fallback position is always "God, guns, and gays": Liberals are against God, gonna take your guns, and make homosexuality in the mainstream. Republicans preach hate towards the least fortunate peoples: the poor, the immigrant, the homeless. They even preach hate towards veterans, denying them adequate medical care or GI benefits. Meanwhile, they claim that liberals - the group who has supported equal rights for all groups - don't get it.

If morality is about supporting essential institutions, how can you call Republicans moral when their strategy has famously been to undermine our most essential institutions: schools, health care, infrastructure. To see Republicans as moral, you would have to count the NRA as an essential institution. You'd have to include the hate-spreading Religious Right as an essential institution. You'd have to count the multinational job-exporters as essential institutions. You would, essentially, have to see reality through a myopic, diseased lens to consider the Republicans moral under that criteria.

If morality is about living in a sanctified and noble way, Mr. Haidt, then you Republicans would have to cast their vote for someone other than McCain or Palin. McCain was the "brains" behind the Keating Five. He refused to honor Martin Luther King. He denied benefits for veterans, the group which he is supposed to most empathize. Palin lies and lies and lies, about selling her plane on Ebay at a profit, about not wanting the Bridge to Nowhere, about stealing from the taxpayers of Alaska, and more still. Are these noble acts? Are these sanctified acts? No and No again. These are loathsome and low and unworthy of any definition of morality.

Don't tell me I don't know what morality is, Mr. Haidt. Don't tell me I don't "get it". Don't hide behind false rhetoric and deception in the hopes of getting more Republican votes.

Or prepare yourself for the mountain of vomit which is sure to fall your way.

SPORE's fucking Securom...

I picked up SPORE yesterday and I have to say, "Great game."

DON'T BUY IT.

Listen to me. They use that awful Securom anti-piracy measure that plays hell with your hard drive and then won't let you reinstall it when you get your hard drive fixed. Now, I'm stuck with a worthless disk and I don't dare give it to Vicky to install on her machine because it'll fuck that up, too.

Here's what you do. If you want it, and you should if you like light, fun games, get it through STEAM, the download service provided by VALVE. They let you reinstall as many times as you like with no Securom and no fucked up hard drives. Do yourself a favor.

Meanwhile, I'll continue hating EA.

Weird workplace...

I made it through the gauntlet at my new job; I finished probation.

It's not that hard. There's one rule here: Look busy.

And this is what I want to write about today, because it's more fucked up than you can possibly imagine. Nobody actually works. As long as you can look busy, you impress your Taiwanese bosses. I've only completed about a dozen projects in three months - and I'm known around here as being manic about my job. It's crazy. I spend seven hours of my day waiting, sitting and waiting.

After Allied, I was really hoping to find a job where I could contribute and do something worthwhile. But not only can I not work here - because if I do too much, I'm told to slow down because I'm putting too much pressure on other people - but I also can't fill the void by writing, because I'm watched most of the time to make sure I look like I'm busy working on a product...

It's like fucking hell.

Remember to get what you deserve...

I keep hearing and reading about Sarah Palin's speech last night. I read about how filled with verve and venom it was, about how it knocked that Obama guy down a peg.

It was also filled with lies, but that's neither here nor there I am told. What does it matter that the Republican party has gone schizophrenic: Biden's experience in the Senate doesn't count but McCain's does. Palin has enough experience after being the mayor of a tiny hamlet and governor of the least-populated state, but Obama doesn't as a US Senator. McCain's flip-flops don't count because he's the Change Candidate. Obama is the elitist; pay no attention to McCain's many properties. The Republican hypocricy of calling themselves the party of "family values" while having one candidate with multiple marriages and another with teen pregnancies - abstinence only folks! - while Obama and McCain have actual family values doesn't seem to bother anyone. Just ignore it, I'm told, because that Palin sure is cute, isn't she?

But I don't hear about how the Republican's are appealing to our better selves. I don't hear about how they are providing a brighter future for our children. I don't hear about how they care for regular people. Tax cuts for the rich, tax breaks for big oil, more wars, fewer rights - that's what I hear.

And I am reminded of that old saying, about how we get the government we deserve, and I'm thinking about what we deserve after years of illegal wars, torture, and abuse of power.

Vicky's been talking about moving out of this country, abandoning this sinking ship of state... she may have a point...