Monday, March 28, 2005

Jogging at 100 miles per hour…

Honest to Bob, I don't know what the hell's going on with my body. I look heavier but I weigh less. My pants are tighter but I'm in better condition.

… I have the sniffles a little.

It's annoying, this getting old stuff.

I've mentioned before that I've been working out but I'm not getting the results I want. Time to kick it up a notch. (BAM!) (Sorry!!!!) Rather than five times/week (which actually turns out to be more like four), now, I'm gonna pump it up to eight! (Mind you, I'll probably die as a result…. But at my funeral, you can say I look thin… especially since I plan to be cremated…)

So, it started last night. I went to the gym in the evening, after Vicky and I spent the morning hiking - where went the days of smokes and scotch??? - and hit the treadmill. It goes a long way back, my desire to run… probably as far back as junior high school, when I would shoplift Hustler magazines and run like hell…

But my attention was taken off my own machine by this woman at 10o'clock. She was RUNNING at full tilt with the incline on the treadmill set WAY up… You just wanted to watch her either die or achieve flight! (She's the one going 100 miles per hour, by the way…)

I jogged for 45 minutes, eating up a respectable 3.5 miles. All the while, I was watching The Contender on TV. What an amazingly stupid show! Here, we have Sly telling boxers he knows what they're going through. Pardon?! He ACTED like he knew - he never KNEW! Then, before these guys can box, they have to do interviews and obstacle courses and - isn't this a show about boxing??? All the while, I'm jogging with the Rocky theme going through my head. "Gonna DIE now!!!!"

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