Wednesday, July 07, 2004

If I was a "writer", I would drink...

So, what has been happening in my life other than this Vicky person who I love?

My boss has hired a new marketing writer. He decided that, though I was hired as such, I had no qualifications as a marketing writer since I didn't come from an ad agency and, thus, needed to hire someone else. That person just came out of his office. For half an hour, they talked about promotions for wireless products. If I had been in that meeting, I probably would have recommended such phrases as "Smarter Wireless" or "Faster Wireless". This new lady (and, no, I don't think she's useless because she's a woman) thought of such profound phrases as "Better Wireless" and "Richer Wireless"... because it has more fat content or something. After a bit more talking, they decided on the phrase "Wireless Made Better". Obviously, I'm not cut out for this "writing" thing and should avoid all use of "words" in the future...

Keith has disappeared on me and I'm left wondering if I mind. Let's face it. He lied when he went back east, while I was here rooting for him, and he knows I know. He probably also knows that there will be fireworks when next we meet.

My mom has officially given up on her PC. I got tired of fixing it repeatedly and, I suppose, breaking it repeatedly was wearing thin for her as well. At least, I tried.

I need to start getting out copies of the "Something to Hide" DVD... because people cannot live without watching me, right?

When was the last time I sat down with a half dozen pitchers of martinis? It's been far too long, I tell you! This past weekend, I drank like a normal person - a few here - a few there - never getting more that a mild buzz... But there's something very wrong with that. I seriously need to catch up on my drinking or I'm going to lose my membership card, blazer badge, and that nifty "Drunks Decoder Ring" that came in that bottle of Gibleys...

... and update on the new "writer". As I was typing this email, Mike came to me.

"What do you think of the phrase: Wireless Made Better?"

My bad habit is honesty. Can't kick it. I've tried. "It sounds subjective," I answered.

"It's supposed to. It's marketing," I told me as though I was an idiot. Why does he even bother to ask my opinion???

"No," I came back. "It's too vague. Better than what? By who's standard? See? It sounds like we've just decided that willy-nilly."

"So, what do you think it should be?"

"That depends on which way we want to go. We can't say we're making it better unless it is better. That means we'll actually need to make our products better. But better isn't good enough. It doesn't say anything to the consumer with any meaning. Since everyone is simplifying, why not go with easy? Wireless Made Easy? And if you go with that, actually make the products easy to use."

"I didn't ask you to redesign it." he said, shutting me down.

"I just -"

"I've got your opinion." he said, and walked away.

Yep. Love it here.

Where's my drink?

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