Don't mind him, folks. He lost his wife.

God, I'm tired. I'm really tired. Tired is a two-lane highway that goes from Los Angeles to St. Louis. Well, I'm out here in Jersey, well past tired! I kept going after tired ended. I'm asking for directions just to get back to tired!

Sunday night, I didn't even fully get to sleep before the terror set in and I had to get up before I started screaming. Last night, I tried sleeping on my sofa, hoping the change might help, but I was up within minutes with my arms folded tightly, reminding myself it was just a nightmare. Then, I went outside and had a cigarette because there was no way I would stay in there and a needed something to ease the sense of panic away.

Meanwhile, we're in our last week of rehearsal before we need to be "off book". "Off book" is not a quaint way of indicating we were standing on encyclopedias. No, "off book" means that we will have to have our lines memorized. I will have to have my lines memorized. Jeepers.

In a play where everyone seems to be married or in a relationship, I was taking a wee bit of comfort in the fact that two of the other actors, Bruce and Danya, were also single. Then, last night, I found out Bruce has a girlfriend... and she is Danya.

... of course. So, I'm the only single one in the bunch.

All I want for Christmas is a mafia hit... on myself!